Adulting 301- The Block and Delete

The Block and Delete is a wonderful gift from technology that we have to be mindful of when using. Find that balance between Self-Preservation and not being an Ass can be tricky.Here are a few ways to help you find that solid middle ground!

Be a Blessing if You Can

Save the Block and Delete for people who have done something to warrant being sent to the phantom zone. No one likes being ignored or iced out without some form of explanation. I’ll get off my Unicorn for a second and agree that no, you don’t owe anyone anything. There is no written contract between you and the tinder date that didn’t act out the plot of your favorite Rom Com. But maybe we should develop those confrontation skills, *cough cough fellow millennials*. Letting a Level 13 Clinger down easily can be a real process, but if you’re firm, empathetic and kind, you’re being a blessing to that person. Who knows, you may be dealing with someone with extensive abandonment, attachment, or trauma related issues. A little kindness can go a long way. When we do right by people, we give them the best opportunity to do better.

No Means Hell No

Sometimes we run into people who aren’t exactly into the word “No.” Despite your best efforts to be kind and firm, they keep coming at you like a spider monkey. If being clear hasn’t worked, Block and Delete. No need to melt your brain working harder than the person who actually needs to be working on themselves. Remember, if you ever feel like this is a “dangerous person”, please take the proper steps to make sure you don’t get snatched up. Abusive and/or Narcissistic personalities have a true talent for making you feel guilty about not wanting to be ya know, abused…

Kicking The Habit

Remember, it’s not just a defensive tactic to keep a “crazy” from blowing up your phone, it’s also a decent way to keep you from sliding into the inbox of that ex who triggers ever cell in your body to operate against your own best interest. Once The Block and Delete has been initiated, you should be in the clear. Just make sure you delete their digits from everything (i.e backup assistant, email, phone, cloud.) Don’t forget about those email accounts, social media accounts and chat apps. The wrong Tweet or DM may have you foaming at the mouth or crying into a gallon of ice cream and then your back in it!

Take the Plea or Go to Trial

The Block and Delete is not a tool that should be used to avoid facing accountability when you have been a less than impressive human. It should be noted that anyone who has ever pulled a Block and Delete for this reason more than likely needs to be avoided anyway. Does this mean that people should be allowed to lay into you with the intensity of a Baby Boomer receiving bad customer service? Nope! Just try and be a grown up and allow people their day in court if you’ve been found guilty of any asshat related charges. It’s good for you.

Be Aware of Your Intentions

If you’ve used Block and Delete more than 2 times with the same person, you got some things you need to chew on. This should not be used as a way to punish a romantic partner, family member or friend during a fight. This is a clear communication that you want to END all communication. If you’re supposed to be ending communication but you aren’t sticking with it, it’s time to have a talk with yourself. Ask your closest friend with the most reliable stank eye, they got your back.

Toxic is Toxic

The Block and Delete is not just for out of control exes or botched romantic endeavors. There are many situations and dynamics that may require removing someone from your playing field, especially the Toxic ones. Setting boundaries with Toxic Personalities is of course great for you, but it’s also really good for them in the long run. People can be oblivious to how their behaviors affect others. Sometimes a well-placed boundary is just the push they need to start taking a real look at themselves. Call upon the whatever higher power you get down with, mine is Gaga, to give you the strength to suppress your petty side.

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Author: Patrick Henderson LPC

I'm a licensed counselor working to try and stay sane while creating more resources and awareness for mental health services. I love my job so much, but I need a change of pace. I want to continue creating resources but why not have a bit of fun while I'm at it right? Come check out my blog where you can have access to a ton of rambling from me that should be definitely be educational and hopefully humorous as well. Come check out my "Pro Bono Adventures" and ways to help support mental health!

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